3 years later....

I was rushing to get into the cafe when my phone started ringing... I knew it was him...

Hey, I'm almost there.

Oh great... I just called up to confirm whether u r coming or not..See you soon then!

Huh..what? He reached early and waiting for me? For the first time ever since i knew him!

I opened the door, got into the cafe and looked over. 

Hey!

It was him... from the right corner... he managed to get the same old table i guess.. Well, now what was that for? 

Hey.... you reached early?

I pulled out a chair n took my seat..

Yeah... was quite free today, so i just.... anyways, u hated to wait, didn't you? so thought I'd take the pain to reach early at least this time.. , he winked.

I gave a frown smile... 'got caught up with something at the last moment...sorry!'

Hey! that's absolutely OK !

I gave that brisk smile again. I looked here and there and finally our eyes met. The music from the cafe started fading and i couldn't stand that feeling going through me. I found myself losing it all over again. Suddenly, I took my eyes off from him, pulled out the menu card and stared on it.

I could sense the music playing in the cafe all over again and things suddenly fell in place. It takes only a moment to lose your senses, and to get it back is quite a tough task. Anyhow, i could get a grip on myself this time.

So what ya up to these days, Indu? he broke the silence between us.

Well, same old thing - writing, chose copy and working for an ad agency for the past 2 years. Wat's up with you?

Wow.. that's sounds great. You always wanted to be a writer, didn't you? happy for you... I'm with my dad now... looking after his new business here.

Yeah ! Writing was always my passion... have not dropped my plans on the novel too !

That's interesting.Chal, let's order something..what would you like to have? Cold coffee?

Yeah..

And i started staring at all the art, paintings,cushions, curtains and everything the cafe had. I knew he was, instead staring at me, but i didn't want to start some conversation that would break the calm i had maintained inside me.

He started  a conversation to break the silence and the awkwardness that sustained between us. he came up with all the casual topics, like family, friends, what they were up to and all that. We, anyway, hadn't come to the cafe to talk - not to stare at the walls! He kept on talking about his work, the life he had... he tried to portray himself as someone new, but i could see the same old Karthik i knew - childish, impractical, sensitive, romantic Karthik i adored more than anything.

I was about to take the last sip of my coffee when he asked me.. 'Indu, shall we go for a walk, if you don't mind?'

'Errrr.. well, I'm getting late... I've plans with some friends'

He looked into my eyes.. I understood, he knew that i was lying. I looked down and kept silent.

Please....?

'Hmmm...', i checked my watch, 'well.. okay...'

He paid the bills even though i insisted I'd pay. Call it ego than formality...

We started  walking along the streets near the cafe. Memories flowed back like an agitated river - the street side benches where we used to spent our evenings, the art gallery, the restaurant on the other side of the road... everything made me nostalgic and made me realize how much i missed the guy walking along with me all these years! He was silent too, and i knew, he was feeling the same too.

So, are you....seeing someone?

 I asked him... i was curious,  i just wanted to know whether the thought i had just now wasn't wrong.

Nope... single - that's what my Face book relationship status says for the past 3 years.! he winked.

But, why?

'Certain questions don't really have an answer nor are they sensible,  to the person who has to answer at least.... Especially when the one who shoots it absolutely knows what the reason is !'

I was transfixed. I didn't know what i should say.

Again, my ego couldn't stop myself... Above all, i lost my patience. I wanted to ask everything i wanted to ask him all these years.

'What made you call me Karthik, after so many years?'

He stopped walking and stood still.. I turned around and saw him staring at me. His  eyes were filled...

What happened Karthik?

He was blushing with anger. He came next to me, pulled me aside..'So many years? 3 years  Indu.... 3 miserable years! Do you have any idea what i was going through? how much i missed you? How many times i dialed  your number and then stopped myself?

he looked at me for a while standing next to him ,numb... he suddenly got his senses back.. he took his hands off my shoulders, leaned on the wall, closed his eyes, and stood there for a while. I didn't know what to say....

I'm sorry.. he said.. and looked  at me..

its okay.. i said, and started walking..

He went on.. ' U know Indu... there are certain relations which would last for ages, there would be differences between the people involved,  but what makes them stay for each other is that, there's a bond, there's love and above all understanding between the two. these relations may not really have a name, but they, are in fact very special. On the other hand, some cannot handle these relations not because they don't love or understand each other, but that they expect a lot from the other. they think if the other person loves me, he/she would change for me, change whatever i cant accept in that person. But the other, expects this person to accept him/her as what he/she is. and these expectations starts ruining the relationship...'

He took a deep sigh and then continued... ' we fall into the latter..expectations ruled us..we wanted to be together.. we tried ages to save the relation and be together. but we couldn't really help it. It ended, and for it was so tough for me to get over you... I tried a lot, every possible way i can. Spent time with friends, met gals, went out with them, but i couldn't really be with them. Later i thought to change myself, to the one u always wanted to be with, and  decided to call you until i didn't find myself good enough to present before you'

He paused...

'It might have been easy for you to say goodbye, and leave just like that... but for me it was terrible! I didn't show it up, i didn't come behind you... for u didn't want me to.. u didn't want me to be sensitive.. you wanted  me to be practical about life, you wanted me not  to be possessive about you - you wanted me to be something i was not. I did try... and that made me reach wherever  I'm.  Well thanks to you.. but then... you shouldn't have punished me by staying away. You could have tried it staying by my side.'

Now, i couldnt take it any longer.  I couldn't stop my tears and  i let out my feelings.

"Karthik, do you think it was easy for me? Do u think i wanted to punish you..?. You know very well, am so impatient and short tempered... and i cant stand something beyond my limits. Still i took it for around 4 years. you know why? 'coz i loved you! I left you, i wanted to break up with you, i do admit. but that doesn't mean i never wanted you. I did it coz i couldn't take it any further. I thought breaking up with you at that particular moment would be better for the two of us."

'Did it help you any way?'

'No, it didn't... It was tough for me as well.. but i had to live with it anyway... and replacing you with someone else was unimaginable for me'

Both of us looked at each other and kept silent. I could feel some peace flowing inside me... all the guilt, regret everything slowly started fading.

he slowly touched my palms and hold it tight... and  that was the moment, i was waiting for all these years.

' I thought u wouldn't pick my call, nor did i expect you'd come'.. He said

'Why wouldn't i? that was what i was waiting for, since we broke up.. You could have called me way before.. stupid.. y did u take so long?'

'I dunno.. may be, my ego.. or the fear of you thrashing me all over again... that would have been far more than i can take'

"How did you guess i was not in a relationship with someone else?' i was curious

'I know you better than you do' he winked

'okay, but what if i had fallen for someone else?'

'you didn't.. so let it be.. y asking stupid questions... ?'

'So, am i in? will you break up with me again, we if i slept till 10 AM or if i took leave for a day to give a surprise?' he asked me with a naughty smile - the smile i loved the most.

i were stupid, weren't i?

You still are... and that drives me crazy!

I looked at him, we laughed.. i leaned towards him, placed me head on his shoulder n he held me tight like never before..i knew what it conveyed. !

When young becomes old....

Jayesh Mohan Photography

Old age - Something no human can protest against... We never know when it hits us, and once it does, there's no rescue. It comes to us with no warning and we are destined to be its slave for the rest of our life.. To some, it comes so early and the worst part is that, you wouldnt realise you are getting old until its too late and once you realise, it would be just too impossible to do something! In the long run to earn money, to make your family happy and safe, you spend half or more of your life to work. Work rules your life and you run behind money. You may not even have time to look upon what you lose, coz  all you want is money. 


Once you earn enough and more, and when you turn back, down the memory line, all you could find is just work, money and  nothing else! You would have missed everything and unlike your peers, you would have become too weak and too old to get things right. You start cribbing and whining about the unfortunate life you had. Your rusted memory would have nothing to cherish about in this old age. And above all, the  family you cared for, for whom you lived and sacrificed the best part of your life, would be cursing you for giving them no time when they wanted you. They throw you at some god forsaken oldage home probably,as the punishment for not being a good father/mother, for not having enough time for them, for not taking care of  them - for all that you did to them, you deserve to be deserted!


And someday, when you go for a walk along the beach side, you manage to find a seat facing th deep blue sky and the roaring waves, refreshing your memory and ending up with those office files and conference halls and nothing to cheer about..YOu ask yourself, "What have i earned?" You would badly wish, you could turn back time, gain all that you missed and have a normal life like everyone else did... And land up in a long suspire as you know nothing can be done other than living what's left with your life, following all the rules and regulations the oldage home had imposed on you.... 


You say to yourself, "If money was not a necessity, but just a necessity......" 


sigh!!!!!!


https://www.facebook.com/jayeshmohanphotography

To All PRITHVIRAJ Haters!

To all those who make stories up in which Prithviraj is the "hero"..(well, u know what I'm talking about), i wanna ask just one question.... WHO IS PRITHVIRAJ?

A) A Serial Killer
B) A Rapist
C) A Corrupt Politician
D) A Womanizer
E)A Con
F) A Gangster
G) A Smuggler
H) A Terrorist
I) All of the aobve
J) None of these

Well, i guess he fall in to the "None of these Category"... In that case, can u guys tell me y he's gettin' targeted every now and then? Coz he's supposed to be a very arrogant actor, who doesnt act and speaks whatever comes to his mind in front of the media unlike other actors? Is that the reason u've got? SHAME ON YOU!

There have been many other actors who are known for their arrogance, some with the tag "womaniser" n certain others involved in illegal activities... they were never targeted like this, have they? They are instead treated as superstars, best actors....

No one really know how these people are off camera.. so it would be better if u stop judging someone with how they react in front of camera... Do u really think these actors who behave as if they are humble n polite are not acting in front of the media to seek attention?

He might be arrogant, but i personally respect him for being himself, unlike others... But, look at him... Tall, handsome... any gal wud fall for him, is that what annoys you? ;) I call it jealousy ;) But y? Coz your wife/gf is his fan?

Whatever your reasons be, I wanna point out one thing.. earlier Sardars were targeted, SMS saying they are the most foolish community on Earth, those jokes where super duper hit, n then came TINTUMON who indeed became the Hero of Kerala.... N your Grudge towards Prithvi made him replace Tintu... So the bottom line's .... You are tryin' to insult him, you r being successful too, but at the same time you guys are indirectly promoting him... :D

You know what negative publicity is.. Well, who doesnt? That's how Santhosh Pandit became ALIEN SUPERSTAR... Imagine. even he has got FAN FOLLOWING? How? Through negative publicity! That too through us! Our hatred towards him made him a close-to celebrity... Like wise, your hatred towards Prithvi is helping him.. :) :)

In short, all i gotta say is that...in the politest way...GUYS, GET A LIFE !!

I rest my case!

How to screw up a close-to-perfect life..! ;)

After my tips on how to enjoy(screw up) your college life here,

http://beingdevi.blogspot.com/2009/08/how-to-enjoy-screw-up-your-college-life.html

I kinda feel like talkin' about the various possible ways of screwin up a close-to-perfect( the word perfect is ideal u see) life..

1. If you are still a school going chap, one of the things yo can do is, sing "silsila hey silsila" or "rathri subharathri" in the assembly instead of National anthem :D
2. Abuse the ultimatum HM...
3. If you are a college student, well you can refer the link mentioned above ;)
4. HOD ya Dean ki beti ko patao ;)
5. Refer point 2.
6. Play porn movie instead of your project/seminar presentation :D
7. Display affection towards your friend (of same gender) especially when your parents are around... Dont forget to watch Gay porn videos on your home theatre so that you parents can see them too..Now with all that, do i really gotta explain  what would happen next? ;)
8. Make friends with your boss's wife/GF and talk with them for hours over phone.
9. Refer point 2 with HM replaced with TL/Manager.
10. Keep "Bhaag DK boseDk" as you ring tone when your boss calls you.
11. Sing those SRK songs aloud in his style (titlt a little,both hands stretched on sides) during official meeting.
12. Update in Facebook that your boss is GAY.
13. Refer point 6.
14. Get MARRIED! :D
15. Marry a bitch :D
16. Store your GF/Wife's number on your phone as "Vamp"
17. Forget to wish her on her Bday/anniversary/the day she bought that stupid puppy/the day she stoppeed eating chocolate etc etc...
18. Tell her what you feel for her best friend :D
19. Watch cricket when she's talks about serious stuffs like how she managed to save the life of an ANT..
20. Disconnect the call or sleep while she's talking.

PS:Now, these are just a few things.. you can do a hell lotsa things so as to make yourl ife nothing less than hell  :)

PPS: GF/wife can even be replaced with BF/husband.

PPPS: just for fun.. no offence pls :)

One last time....

She put her phone back for the 100 th time without making the call. She dialed his number umpteen times, but didnt really have the strength to say a "hello" at least. The guiltiness was killing her.. N now, even she managed to call him she was afraid, how he'd react. Above all, the egotist didnt want to do it all over again.. Its been ages since she has been doing it n she was quite done with whatsoever she was doing with him..She was back on her path of perplexity..Suddenly she stood up, picked up the phone, dialed his number and closed her eyes.

It was just 10 days since they spoke but it seemed to her like ages.. and she couldnt stop herself from missing him....

Tring tring... tring tring.... 

"The number you are trying to reach is currently busy... please try again later"

Haan,, so he disconnected the call... obvious thing.. She expected nothing other than that. She was staring at her phone for a text message atleast...

Beep

She picked it up and opened the message.. It said:

"what?"

Now she was a bit relieved.. he responded :)

"One last time"

"You gonna kill yourself or what"

She was literally stupified...

"Please... One last time"

"Just tell me this, what you gonna do - kill yourself/. gonna throw your phone away? abuse me? Or all of the above?"

Well... What else would he expect? She has been doing the same for the past 6 years! Still, he took it all.. and even after torturing him for years, she broke up with him for no good reason! 

Sigh!

"I couldnt take this pain all over again.. Am just too... i dunno how to explain it.. but i just cant miss you anymore. i need you back, forever... You have always been there, you stood with me, loved me more and more no matter what i did... And i just wanna let you know, i love you too more than you can ever imagine.... I just cant be like this, am lost... And now as i'm dying......"

She stopped typing n read it all over again.... No, he seems to be happy these days.. if she let him know that she was dying he may not be able to take it.... or what if he takes it as a joke and replies something that would tear her apart?

Well, she had lied to him million times that she was dying just to seek his attention - you cant expect anything else from an attention seeker... After all, he was the only one who ever showed that someone loves or cares for her.. Her busy parents never ever had time to sit with their child nor did they listen when she begged she couldnt take this loneliness.... he was nothing less than God to her.  he gave her everything she wanted, but then, she forgot he had a life of his own... He had a life, a family n a bunch of friends to take care of...  He had to build up his life and  then to take her in.... it was a big deal indeed.. but she never realised.. She always wanted him 24*7 by her side.. She was in living in that fantasy world where everything was perfect - A perfect life with him being with her, giving her everything she wanted....

Now, how would she tell him she was dying? She knew there was something real bad happening with her, she didnt know what exactly it was,  what disease she had.. But the way her doctor n parents reacted, she was quite sure... She was dying..

She has got no time left... She had to leave him forever... he may not get to hear her voice again.. He wouldnt call her "my love" anymore... He may not be able to hug her n wipe her tears off, look into her eyes n say "i love you" with that smile which she loved more than anything... He cannot sing for her which was indeed one worst thing, but still she loved it... He wouldnt get calls from her in the middle of the night saying "i wanna  see you right now", "take me there tomorrow".... And if he ever knew everything's gonna end forever.... she couldnt just imagine how he'd react..

No matter how often they fight, call each other bitch/bastard, break up or say good bye... they knew  thats not gonna stop them from loving each other... They'd definitely pick up easily and behave as if nothing happened....

A drop of tear rolled down her cheek n she couldnt stop the flow... She took the phone again... read the text all over again n deleted it off.. She might be able to manage the loss, but the day he knows whats happening with her.....

Sigh!

 She'd love to spend her last moments with him n would die happy, but then, the pain that's gonna give him made her selfless...

She kept the phone aside, lied down on her bed, closed her eyes n sighed over and over.... And then she started staring at the phone all over again, wishin' for a text message from him... or a call...for one last  time...

Wait a minute :)

Wait a minute!

You, me or no one is born just to realise that the life we've got is troublesome and it sucks :) Everyone's life is worrisome, no one has got a perfect life as we call it. Life is, on first place, what we make it. If you find your life to be one big mess and do nothin' to sort it out, u'll end up being a big time loser. Noone is a loser, unless he/she wants to be. Everyone's equally good as the other. If u choose a way to get out of that mess, there would be no place for cribbing and whining. 


Venus, Mars or Jupiter has got nothing to do with your life - that's something you gotta realise first. Even if there's ssomeone called GOD, this aint no test by him.


Actually you get what you deserve. But iif u think this aint what u deserve, then work hard to turn it into your favour. (dialogue courtesy : Aravind Kg) 


If u feel like endin' up your life for something you would find very silly n stupid later in your life, remember, no one's gonna lose anything other than u! someone wud cry or wud miss you, but ultimately everyone wud forget and wud move on with their lives.. and u.... wud have lost your life forever :)


So in short, if you are in big trouble, let me tell you, this is not the end of your life. You have got miles to go. Enjoy the moment n stop worryin' about the past or the future. One is over and the other, Well, you have no clue whether u'd find it or not. :) Chill!


Dedicated to all those who think their life sucks.. Mine sucks too, but i've found my way that, though it is loaded with truck load of crap, it isnt that stinky as it is supposed to be..... :)

FYI dear North, East, West & South Indians...

I was amazed when a Mumbaikar asked me while i was checking FBvia phone, "Do South Indians use FaceBook and stuffs like that?"

Errr.... whaat? Are you kidding me? Why wouldnt we? 

Now, u guys think your place is USA n ours is Jamaica? hello? We all belong to a place called India.... And we are all Indians...

But still, if u think u r better... well, You might be better, but there are few things you forget often...

• South India as a whole is not comprised of villages, and we are not villagers !!
• We prefer to be bound in our Indian culture, where you are more keen about what's happening in the West..
• We prefer wearing Salwars, Sarees, Dhothis and lungis, whereas u prefer showing off :) 
• Guess you are unaware of the fact that B'lore, hyderabad and Kochi is a part of South India..
• We might appear as Behanjis to you as we aremore comfy wearing salwars, but trust me on this looks can be deceptive..
• We prefer "naadan kallu" over Whisky, Brandy or Vodka ;)
• We know English, we are quite inhibited to talk, we are bothered about grammar while u guys doesnt even bother about what you are talking..
• APJ Abdul Kalam is a South Indian :)
• Even Sridevi, Dream girl Hema Malini, Prabhu Deva,Rajni kanth And Maestro A.R.Rahman are South Indians :)
• Most of the Bollywood Movies are either remade or inspired from South Indian movies...
• We love Aamir Khan just like we love Rajnikanth or Mammootty...
• We never differentiate you as Bengali or a Mumbaikar but as an Indian, just like us...

Now, if i talk about Kerala alone...

• We, malayalees to be precise, brush our teeth, bath and wash our clothes DAILY...
• You can find us anywhere in this Globe... Gulf country has now become a part of Kerala ;) LOL
• If u ask a British guy or an American where Mumbai is, he might say "I dont know", but he definitely knows KERALA..
• Where do u think u get those coconuts from? :)

I can go on with the list, but then.. all i wanna say is that.. forget it guys.. we are all Indians... We belong to India - the land of different culture, languages, customs and rituals... hence, there would be difference in the way u r n the way i am...Lets be proud of being an Indian than pointing out the  flaws in our neighbour.. So lets be INdians on first place than being Northies or Southies or whatever...

JAI HIND!

A humble request from a fellow human being!

Why should we have "orphanages" across the country? Why should there be ORPHANS  on first place? Orphanages should all be demolished.. !!! But for that, it should be ensured that no one remains as an orphan...

Who is an orphan? 

- Some one who doesnt have PARENTS.

Who is a parent?

- One who gives birth to a child... 

So how are orphans created? Are they someone you get when you dig the ground for something or you find in the ocean when you go for sail? NO! They are created just like how we all are, where a biological process is involved - you know what i'm talknig about!! The only difference is that we know who is behind our birth n they dont! 

Why is this happening? We are in an era where the technology has advanced so much providing solutions for each and everything our grandparents had no clue about. It also has  provided wide range of protective measures to have a safe sexual life. 

Unprotected sex is not just a reason behind the increase in the number of orphans... But here, am focusing on that particular point which i think is predominant...

The world has advanced so much that the "married" couples these days prefer not to have children n they clearly know how it is attained. No matter  how much the world has advanced, there is no decrease in the count of  orphans.. Why is it so? If  you are so desperate to  have sex, who is stopping you? But why cant u use  the protective measures so that you are dont give birth to  a "basterd" or choose abortion which indeed makes you a murderer.

Giving birth is one of the best things ever. If you dont know the value, go ask infertile couple what it means to them. they are dying to have a kid and you are killing or dumping them ! wah!! Poverty is one major reason, but then, condoms comes in a very low rate, dont they? Or i'd suggest the Govt to provide the people below poverty line with free condoms just like how they provide rice and other stuffs!

Advertisements and campaigns on the necessity to use "condoms" are done for the past so many years. Still, people find it a difficult task to buy one condom!! Listen, "condom" or "sex" is NOT bad words. Both are necessary things infact. Its gonna happen with each  one of us some day or the other, with the opposite sex n in some with the same sex.i know there will be atleast one person questioning me sayin "hey, what have u written? how can u write something about sex or condom, being a gal?" 

Huh? Sorry what? So, gals should nt know or talk about sex? wow!!  Now that leads me to ask a few questions to you, but that would deviate me from the topic i've been discussing about!

So my whole point is that, if you badly wanna have sex, have it, but a safe one. Am not here  to endorse some condom company or their products, but thinking about the fact that when we have two people in our lives called father and mother who give us everything we ask for, they, orphans as we call them, who do have parents like u and me do , but have no clue who they are, gets ruined at some effing place, gets ill treated, raped, becoming criminals, terrorists, murderers just because they are ORPHANS !!

There are hell lot of orphanages across, but we dunno whats exactly happening inside - whether they are treatedwell or not. We dont know !!! IF they are getting ill treated, is that what they really deserve?  They aresuffering where you are the root cause. They are getting punished for the mistake you did... Same with abortion. The baby is getting killed for something u did.. They dont deserve to b killed or dumped. They deserve a better place in the world, to live, to get a better live, to be something... Some might get adopted, but what about the rest?

If u ask me how this problem can be solved, i'd say, its upto each one of us to decide. May be the one small mistake we do would destroy someone else's life. So let's better be cautious n think twice before getting involved in such things, as, in most cases,  if we trace out an orphan's parent, it would be some one like us - well educated, from a well off family but dumb!! 

What can we do? We cannot go around, ask people "hey, are you plannig t odo this? if yes, dont.. these are the after effects" ... No! Being a part of an NGo can hel pthem some way, but that doent give the PARENTS! So,all we can do is, plege ourselves that we'll not be one who'd give birth to an orphan, nor will we be a part of an abortion....

- A humble request from a fellow human being!

To every Indian parent - Chuck it guys !!!

This has been running in our society for ages that parents would always say "NO" to every decision their child makes -

"Daddy, can i go for a movie?'

"NO"

"Mamma, can i  have that ice cream?"

"NO"

"Mamma & Daddy, can i go to sleep?"

"NO"

"NO" for everything.. Then, imagine how it'd be when it comes to marrriage.

"Love" relations are most of the times treated as a sin.. Arrrgh!!! Guys isnt that cool to find a guy/gal whom u think u can spend the rest of ur life with happily like most of the movies show?? What's so wrong about it?? As if "arranged marriages" are always a success!

In many cases, they say "no" coz

1. the guy/gal their child found is :

• not from a financially sound family - oh yeah !! dowry is a crime but still they think its bloody cool to give n take lakhs n crores as if u r buying them from a grocery shop !!
• not from the same caste - hello? what's this caste thing all about? Some hypocrite put forward for their sake n millions are still folowing it meaninglessly!
• not from the same religion - huh.. forget about it !! we cant even imagine about our child getting married to some one in another caste, n you are talking about religion !!!
• has got a horoscope which says if these two get married your grandfather's grandfather's soul will not get moksha - Hell with it!!
• the child of someone, whoz sister-in-law's mother's sister's husband's mother's uncle's son's wife's aunt had an inter caste marriage ! - Errrrrr... what??? Oh yeah...! There's someone from another caste in thefamily ! oh, i see!
• has got a pot belly - huh? Y in the world!!! - if i dont have a problem with his/her goddamn it looks, what's bothering you??
• is elder - now, that's a pretty unique case - the gal should always be younger... if not, that's another sin !!! We are all done mentioning about Sachin Tendulkar, Abhishek Bachchan and their wives...
• a non- veggie !! no comments !!

They have millions of other reasons too which we wouldnt even imagine in our dreams !!

Children these days are too smart - they dont wanna elope, they dont want their parents to say "no" to their relation, so they enquire about each and everything about someone whom they are attracted to before getting into a relation- from their dad's bank balance to how many times a day they brush their teeth, so that the parent wouldnt find one small mistake to reject it, n they can have a safe, settled life ahead. Still these parents would say no, for the reason being their child chose his/her partner on her own which inturn is parents' duty! WTF !!

We live in a world where in countries other than ours, parents doubt their child's sexual orientation if he/she doesnt have a BF or GF...." Living together" is so much in !! And poor your children, they dont have a GF/BF just to have "fun", they want to get "married" as you want them to be. Still you are showing your f**king attitude !! Is that coz, J (J for Jealousy) works in you as u were not able to marry the one you loved coz of uir parents ;)

If the child seem to be strong enough on their decision, then there comes the Emotional torture - emosanal atyacchaar as we call it. Stiill, if the child doesnt give a damn, then comes the famous dialogue "You will understand only when u become a parent".... As if parents are meant only to reject child's wishes...

If in case they quit the task of convincing you n plan to elope, and then, that's one hell of a crime u've done... U'll be wrapped with curses....And if u choose to end up ur life, then they'd come up sayin' u cud've tried a bit more to convince us..(i dont support both though) Arrrghhhhhh.... Gimme a break !!!!

And finally, when the child somehow manages to convince parents and gets back to his/her love, he/she might have got married someone else!

ENNA KODUMAI SIR ITHU" :'(

So parents, just chuck it.. after all its their life, let them live with whoever they want... Y torturing them..? Its quite obvious that, u r doing this for the sake of the good-for-nothing "society" who u meet at some party or that sort, who'd ask youy ur child did so... Listen, this society has nothing to do wid your life, they're always their to crticize or to blame... So let ur child's wish be done... Whether their marriage wud be a success or failure that's upto them.. They choose it, so whatever happens is what their deed brings them.. And still if you wanna go for the society, mind you, the society's not gonna feed you at your oldage... If u go against ur child's wish, dont blame them when they dump u in some oldage home ;)

PS : This has nothin' to do with me, my life or my parents...!! 

An early note to the man, whoever that is ;)

Okay... I know you have decided to be with me for the rest of your life, but I guess I should give you a chance to think about it, as I've a list of terms & conditions that might drive you nuts, but let me make it clear, I'm NOT gonna lower the standards I've set! ;) 

• First and foremost, the saree i'd be wearing for the wedding would be simple, less expensive... I prefer not to waste money on useless things :) I know you have nothing to do with that, but it might matter to the ladies on your side ;) 

• Don't expect me to wear  much gold; the next thing I'm gonna say might blow your mind off - I'm not crazy about that metal :) 

• Hey, do u like SALMAN KHAN? Do you? If not, just prepare yourself to be his fan, coz i dont wanna debate over it...I just love him... ;)

•  Do u like SHAHRUKH KHAN? If  yes, well... I dont wanna debate over it as well.. i just hate him...! So u know what you are supposed to do ;)

• Am a great foodie... Indian, Chinese, Italian... Slurppp...You know cooking right? :) Alright, kidding I'm a good cook, but I'm not gonna do it all for myself, help me with the cutting, grinding, etc etc parts :)
• The house is not just mine, it's ours. So lets split the household works :)

• I looooooooooooooove long drives... That too in the middle of the night.. Hope you like it too :)

• Are you a singer? Man... i wish you were one.. I mean, not that great to have "fans",  female fans i mean... :-| but one who can manage to sing, and bowl me over ... *Blush*

• Mind getting me chocolates daily? ;) 

• I wouldn't mind you watching football matches or cricket... But then, always remember, family comes first :)

• Classical music, Opera, Jazz blah blaah...WILL NOT  be entertained... pure filmy music rocks ;)

• Love spending more time with your friends? well, you'll get your space, to some extent :P 

• You have problems with the long list of  friends I've, majority being guys? Well, they are, they will and always be my friends....  I assure, they are very decent people and me n them, we know our limits :)

• Me having problems with your list of female friends... well.... limits please... I wouldn't mind :)

• If you dare to do anything offensive, beware... Am updating it right away in Facebook !! :D

• Am nuts, sarcastic, possessive, dumb, sick and all that... better be comfortable or else its gonna be hard for both of us :D

• When i say I dont love you or miss you, its actually the other way around n if i say i love you or miss you.. its worth believing :)

• Don't ever argue... and always listen.. Pretension will not be entertained... n once caught red handed, u'll have to pay for it! 

Well, the list goes on n on... n i prefer discussing many in person... Get ready to face the devil ;) I swear, i feel sorry for you, but again, we have no other option left ;) I prefer to remain the same, and i want you to respect that :)

PS : Most of the points mentioned are exaggerated and overrated... :D so dont ya worry.. am not that a baddie.... u'll have a  close to peaceful life ;)

And the good times are over !!!

Meetin' a hell lot of people at that point of tym where u fail to recognize whom to trust n whom not to, when you literally have no friends to point out, and still these people become a vital part of ur life.... You start trustin' them, hopin' they would never do anything offensive like all other idiots did... And finally u start calin'l them FRIENDS which you really mean the way it is !! You reach a point where you cant imagine a life without them, and even if they say they dont consider you as a friend or they where plannin' n plottin' behind you, you'd laugh out loud coz u know they were kidding !!

Hours of chats, conference chats... Yahoo! being your home, which later swaps to Orkut n then FB... and then hours of phone calls, conference calls too, and all these with no particular topic...u'd discuss about anything n everything under the sun without gettin' bored.... And when exam comes, wakin' up each other instead of keepin' an alarm clock, combine studies mostly over phone.... Meeting each other rarely, but even then, havin lotsa fun when together...Making fun of each other for nothing... Sharin' all ur dreams, happiness, worries n most importantly those silly things, broken love stories to be more precise  ;) which the other wud listen as if thats the most important thing to be solved....

Entry of their GFs & BFs,  having grudges and fighting for their BFs, realizing later, no one really would fall for that stupid BF of urs other dan u.. ;) who inturn become a member of the gang, with same things applicable to them... n then being frnds for a life time..

And then comes those stupid fights which makes you keep away from each other for months ( usually the social hibernation idea ;) but pickin' up easily as if nothing  happened n swearing at you for the same on a random day.... 

Years passes by, everyone becomes busy with their things - hospitals, offices, ABBs, L&Ts,  Banks, Infys, Tatas, IIMs, marrriages steal the major part  of your time.... Hardly would you find time for each other... But deep inside, the bond, the feeling of togetherness, the fun times, everything would remain unaltered... u'd miss each other, and at some point of time, you feel like rewindin' your life to the day you met n never ever want it to get over...!!

Dedicated to those stupid, nasty, good-for-nothing, crazy people i met 4 years back who made my life worth living,made me realize what exactly friendship is, n made me understand- to be friends, you dont have to study in the same school  or college or wherever, or meet often, but share the true relation called friendship....... Thank you guys for accepting me, makin' me a part of that gang, takin  all the crap from me n still considerin' me as a friend... You guys are nuts, so am i... Love ya all... :)

Kiran, Vishu, Apu, Thampi, Harikuttan, Lechu n Manu.... :)

Losing your senses, realizing but unable to help it

Sometimes, the feeling of being lost and lonely suffocates you so much that no matter how hard you try to get over it you come back to that particular point where you were in. You may try to be or act happy as  you always do, but that never shows coz the agony rules you more than anything else. Even the music, movies and playin with kids which kept you engaged n brought smile on your face may not do the needful. You just keep on whinin' to yourself unable to express your sob story to anyone as you know that's not gonna help you out.

You feel  like a born retard who has no clue what's happening around n y people dont give a damn about you. Years of loneliness n u gettin' used to it n then someone changes the whole scenario within a matter of seconds givin' you love, hope, care n everything you longed for, becomes your family, your best friend, brother, sister n everything n then disappears one fine morning leavin' you in trauma which is worser than how things used to be. You realize love n care was what you always wanted. And then, you tryin' to get over it, tryin' to find that love and care or rather that person in everyone you meet n end up in vein. Being a joker in front of everyone, with ur sob stories hopin atleast sum1 would understand your feelings, but then realizing that no one really appreciate the sadness in you, everyone wants FUN which sometimes you fail to provide.

Even after knowing you got hell lot of serious issues to deal with, but sometimes you  find this as the most serious one. And finally u yourself  choose to be alone which might appear dumb to others, but u feel you are better this way, tryin' to start over new, hiding all your sadness, not to get a nervous breakdown n show others that you are strong enough to face all these silly things with no one's help. But once in a while you feel lost n end up being the dumbest person on earth writing all the stupid things on your blog or some other social networking site which has no point at all to be shared.

To the sweetest Amma on Earth, With love :)

I consider myself as one of the luckiest souls coz i own one of the sweetest persons on earth as my mother. ! :) I still remember how i used to be with her when i was a kid. I couldnt imagine a day without lyin' on her lap, playin' with her, gettin scoldings from her for being naughty n sleepin' next her huggin her tight.. Those were the terrible days in my life when i was sent to my aunty's or granny's place for vacation. How dependent i was on her for each and everything..!!

And when i grew up, eventhough we fight for the silliest things - may b she showin' more care towards my sis, supportin' dad when i argue with him, giving out the chocolates that i had saved to my cousins ;) , doing the dumbest things.... I still cant think about a day without her. There was a time when i badly wanted to leave the place n did, i didnt miss her much, but now things have changed, and am happy about it :)

When u listen to ur husband n do things as he wants even if he is wrong, when you gimme those favorite cuisine of urs sayin you dont lyk it at all, when u treat people so well even though u know they dont have high regards for you or are jealous of you, when you help people when they are in need without expecting anything, when you love your husband and children so much, i often wonder how you manage to do all that, coz if i were in your place, i wouldnt give a crap about anything or any1 especially when i get a kiddo like me ;)

I know i often used to fight with you, lost temper n had behaved very badly, went to the extremes even by hurtin you in and out... i still find my points were right n you were wrong, but then, i could have chosen another way of letting you know things which wouldnt have hurt you. But i do admit, i was wrong at tyms too.... And am really sorry for all that i said and did and i mean it... And i very well know u had forgiven me, n thats the difference between you n me..!! I've a lot to learn from you !!

Love you Amma, love you so so soooooooo much.... I just love to be with you, irritate you, make fun of you, scream when you are asleep ;) n do all the nasty things just to see you turn red :) Come with me wherever i go, even when i get married, not for doing house hold stuffs as i often say ;) but to be with me, to teach me how a wife should be, how to look after children and to hold me tight when i feel low.. You are not the best mom in the world, i'd never say that.... But even if i get a chance to be the daughter of the best mom on earth, I'd still choose to be your kid :)

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY !! Love you ! :-* :-* :-*

I dont wanna get married! :(

I guess what I'm gonna share is something every gal would experience some day or the other. They say, marriage is this,marriage is dat.. But ever wondered what a gal would be feeling wen u go n say this to her?

I consider myself as an immature, "still a kid" kinda gal, but my age as my "well wishers" say, is pretty matured enough to get married. F**k you! x-( Is there some rule that every individual should get married? Who the F introduced this bull crap thing on Earth? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...!!Would life be a  hell if u don't get married? I suppose its the other way round!

You grow up at some place you call your "home", you live with people whom u call your "parents", they give u everything you want, you get such a good life no matter how hard its for your parents. You have things which are just urs, your own room, bathroom, loo, dress, handkerchief, comb and what not.

And then, you grow up... You become aged enough to get married. You go to some other place, which actually is your home. Everything you had and you owned were not urs, were more like an illusion. You hardly get to see the people with whom u lived,  whom u loved more than anything.

You gotta live with some guy whom you call your husband. You share everything with him. And now, you dont own a room, u share it with someone else.Earlier, you were a princess, n now, you are not less than a maid! He from Prince, becomes the King..! Everything changes in a matter of time. You r no longer who you used to be!!!

And this guy, would never give you all the love, care and comfort you used to get. For him, you are just a pain in the ass...!!! You gotta change n tune yourself to be the one he wants you to be.. And he, would never change!

WTF Man..! I mean, WTF!! Noooo... Just leave me alone, n let me enjoy being single than being someone's toy!