3 years later....

I was rushing to get into the cafe when my phone started ringing... I knew it was him...

Hey, I'm almost there.

Oh great... I just called up to confirm whether u r coming or not..See you soon then!

Huh..what? He reached early and waiting for me? For the first time ever since i knew him!

I opened the door, got into the cafe and looked over. 

Hey!

It was him... from the right corner... he managed to get the same old table i guess.. Well, now what was that for? 

Hey.... you reached early?

I pulled out a chair n took my seat..

Yeah... was quite free today, so i just.... anyways, u hated to wait, didn't you? so thought I'd take the pain to reach early at least this time.. , he winked.

I gave a frown smile... 'got caught up with something at the last moment...sorry!'

Hey! that's absolutely OK !

I gave that brisk smile again. I looked here and there and finally our eyes met. The music from the cafe started fading and i couldn't stand that feeling going through me. I found myself losing it all over again. Suddenly, I took my eyes off from him, pulled out the menu card and stared on it.

I could sense the music playing in the cafe all over again and things suddenly fell in place. It takes only a moment to lose your senses, and to get it back is quite a tough task. Anyhow, i could get a grip on myself this time.

So what ya up to these days, Indu? he broke the silence between us.

Well, same old thing - writing, chose copy and working for an ad agency for the past 2 years. Wat's up with you?

Wow.. that's sounds great. You always wanted to be a writer, didn't you? happy for you... I'm with my dad now... looking after his new business here.

Yeah ! Writing was always my passion... have not dropped my plans on the novel too !

That's interesting.Chal, let's order something..what would you like to have? Cold coffee?

Yeah..

And i started staring at all the art, paintings,cushions, curtains and everything the cafe had. I knew he was, instead staring at me, but i didn't want to start some conversation that would break the calm i had maintained inside me.

He started  a conversation to break the silence and the awkwardness that sustained between us. he came up with all the casual topics, like family, friends, what they were up to and all that. We, anyway, hadn't come to the cafe to talk - not to stare at the walls! He kept on talking about his work, the life he had... he tried to portray himself as someone new, but i could see the same old Karthik i knew - childish, impractical, sensitive, romantic Karthik i adored more than anything.

I was about to take the last sip of my coffee when he asked me.. 'Indu, shall we go for a walk, if you don't mind?'

'Errrr.. well, I'm getting late... I've plans with some friends'

He looked into my eyes.. I understood, he knew that i was lying. I looked down and kept silent.

Please....?

'Hmmm...', i checked my watch, 'well.. okay...'

He paid the bills even though i insisted I'd pay. Call it ego than formality...

We started  walking along the streets near the cafe. Memories flowed back like an agitated river - the street side benches where we used to spent our evenings, the art gallery, the restaurant on the other side of the road... everything made me nostalgic and made me realize how much i missed the guy walking along with me all these years! He was silent too, and i knew, he was feeling the same too.

So, are you....seeing someone?

 I asked him... i was curious,  i just wanted to know whether the thought i had just now wasn't wrong.

Nope... single - that's what my Face book relationship status says for the past 3 years.! he winked.

But, why?

'Certain questions don't really have an answer nor are they sensible,  to the person who has to answer at least.... Especially when the one who shoots it absolutely knows what the reason is !'

I was transfixed. I didn't know what i should say.

Again, my ego couldn't stop myself... Above all, i lost my patience. I wanted to ask everything i wanted to ask him all these years.

'What made you call me Karthik, after so many years?'

He stopped walking and stood still.. I turned around and saw him staring at me. His  eyes were filled...

What happened Karthik?

He was blushing with anger. He came next to me, pulled me aside..'So many years? 3 years  Indu.... 3 miserable years! Do you have any idea what i was going through? how much i missed you? How many times i dialed  your number and then stopped myself?

he looked at me for a while standing next to him ,numb... he suddenly got his senses back.. he took his hands off my shoulders, leaned on the wall, closed his eyes, and stood there for a while. I didn't know what to say....

I'm sorry.. he said.. and looked  at me..

its okay.. i said, and started walking..

He went on.. ' U know Indu... there are certain relations which would last for ages, there would be differences between the people involved,  but what makes them stay for each other is that, there's a bond, there's love and above all understanding between the two. these relations may not really have a name, but they, are in fact very special. On the other hand, some cannot handle these relations not because they don't love or understand each other, but that they expect a lot from the other. they think if the other person loves me, he/she would change for me, change whatever i cant accept in that person. But the other, expects this person to accept him/her as what he/she is. and these expectations starts ruining the relationship...'

He took a deep sigh and then continued... ' we fall into the latter..expectations ruled us..we wanted to be together.. we tried ages to save the relation and be together. but we couldn't really help it. It ended, and for it was so tough for me to get over you... I tried a lot, every possible way i can. Spent time with friends, met gals, went out with them, but i couldn't really be with them. Later i thought to change myself, to the one u always wanted to be with, and  decided to call you until i didn't find myself good enough to present before you'

He paused...

'It might have been easy for you to say goodbye, and leave just like that... but for me it was terrible! I didn't show it up, i didn't come behind you... for u didn't want me to.. u didn't want me to be sensitive.. you wanted  me to be practical about life, you wanted me not  to be possessive about you - you wanted me to be something i was not. I did try... and that made me reach wherever  I'm.  Well thanks to you.. but then... you shouldn't have punished me by staying away. You could have tried it staying by my side.'

Now, i couldnt take it any longer.  I couldn't stop my tears and  i let out my feelings.

"Karthik, do you think it was easy for me? Do u think i wanted to punish you..?. You know very well, am so impatient and short tempered... and i cant stand something beyond my limits. Still i took it for around 4 years. you know why? 'coz i loved you! I left you, i wanted to break up with you, i do admit. but that doesn't mean i never wanted you. I did it coz i couldn't take it any further. I thought breaking up with you at that particular moment would be better for the two of us."

'Did it help you any way?'

'No, it didn't... It was tough for me as well.. but i had to live with it anyway... and replacing you with someone else was unimaginable for me'

Both of us looked at each other and kept silent. I could feel some peace flowing inside me... all the guilt, regret everything slowly started fading.

he slowly touched my palms and hold it tight... and  that was the moment, i was waiting for all these years.

' I thought u wouldn't pick my call, nor did i expect you'd come'.. He said

'Why wouldn't i? that was what i was waiting for, since we broke up.. You could have called me way before.. stupid.. y did u take so long?'

'I dunno.. may be, my ego.. or the fear of you thrashing me all over again... that would have been far more than i can take'

"How did you guess i was not in a relationship with someone else?' i was curious

'I know you better than you do' he winked

'okay, but what if i had fallen for someone else?'

'you didn't.. so let it be.. y asking stupid questions... ?'

'So, am i in? will you break up with me again, we if i slept till 10 AM or if i took leave for a day to give a surprise?' he asked me with a naughty smile - the smile i loved the most.

i were stupid, weren't i?

You still are... and that drives me crazy!

I looked at him, we laughed.. i leaned towards him, placed me head on his shoulder n he held me tight like never before..i knew what it conveyed. !