For the past few months, my mood has been extremely low or irritable, and I just couldn't understand why. These are the possible reasons that I could find:
a) monotonous life
b) no stepping out, no social life = sad life
c) always seeing the same faces every day
d) haven't travelled in a year
e) too tired for anything, even to have a conversation
f) no friends to rely on in the city
g) no excitement in life
f) no boyfriend
I made up my mind. I have to go somewhere. Somewhere calm and quiet and spend some time alone; rejuvenate and come back. And if possible meet some old friends too. And I booked a resort for the month of April.
Meanwhile, I noticed a pattern - my mind was cluttered, there were too many thoughts and internal conversation going on at the same time and I just couldn't focus on anything, not even reading a fictional novel, which would transport to me some other world. No interest in films or series. No interest to even work. Low self-esteem, existential crisis, feeling like I have failed in life. So on and so forth.
And then, it actually occurred to me; INSTAGRAM REELS - I have been watching too many reels and too much of instagram exposure was affecting my entire system. I have been feeling things I shouldn't including FOMO and comparing myself with my peers. And I was changing into someone I have never desired to become. And then, without a second thought, I deactivated my instagram account overnight. And boom! Within a few days, my mood and everything else improved!
I haven't exaggerated even one bit. Instagram was the villain in my life and now that I am aware, I am quite mindful of what I visually indulge in. I don't know how long I could just keep myself away from the flow but as of now, I know, it was BRAINROT and only I could help myself. And here I am. Doing what I should rather be doing.
